The wedding table plan…..where to start hey?! Many couples say it is one of their most stressful tasks when completing their admin! I am a wedding planner available in London and across the UK, with over 12 years experience, planning and managing weddings and have seen it all when it comes to table plans! With that in mind, I have answered some of your top wedding planning table plan questions below, with the chance of even getting your hands on a copy of my table plan template!
How do you make a wedding table plan?
I would always advise to use a system which works for you for your wedding table plan. Whether you decide to use online software such as https://www.hitched.co.uk/planner/tableplanner/ or https://www.weddingwire.com/wedding-planning/wedding-seating-tables.html, an excel or power point sheet, or a good old fashion pen and pencil! My personal preference is to use an excel sheet, as you can make it personal to your wedding and it is easy to delete/move guests around. Some of these online planners lack features such as showing where dietary requirements, child etc are sitting. Don’t forget, we are talking about your wedmin table plan in the background, not the pretty one you display on the day. Of course, I am not suggesting you use an excel sheet stuck to the wall on the day!
This plan will be used by you to decide where everyone is going, what they are eating and to highlight dietary requirements etc. For an excel sheet, my best suggestion is to have a column for the table number or name, one for the persons name, their dietary requirement and any comments, ie. no gravy. Of course, you will also need separate columns if you have a choice meal. I would advise if this is the case to have a column for each choice and add a ‘1’ for the guests choice so it totals the amount of each dish at the bottom for you, as shown below. If you would like a copy of this plan, please send an email to hannah@hannahroseweddings.co.uk
Make sure you also draw out and take into consideration where each table will be on the day of the wedding in a table chart template. Check this chart with your venue so you know the tables fit how you would like them – they may even provide a plan of the different options for you. You don’t want to need to be moving people around on the day when you realise table 4 and table 7 and behind each other and have people on who you need to split up! The caterers/venue will need copies of both the chart (as below) and the excel sheet so they know where you want the tables and who is on each table for your wedding table plan.
How do you write a wedding table plan?
Writing the actual wedding table plan and putting your tables together can be tricky, I won’t lie to you! Many couples say it was the most stressful part of their planning, so START EARLY! Get it started as soon as your RSVPS are coming in.
My advice would be to start collating your guests into families/couple groups, so for instance, ‘cousin, cousin husband, child 1, child 2’, or ‘Julie + husband’. Once you know the maximum table size, then start to mix the groups together into more extended families/friendship groups, ie, ‘cousin, cousin husband, child 1, child 2’ + ‘nan, auntie, uncle’ (this is an example!) then groups such as work friends, or old school friends. Make sure you are keeping to the maximum table size, if there are two many people on a table, take a ‘group’ away and mix in a smaller one.
There will be a LOT of changing and moving round, hence why excel works really well. I am a fan of a pen and paper, but there will be a lot of rubbing out! If you want to go full Monica style, you could use pegs/pens on a card sheet with everyone’s names which you can then move around.
I would also suggest that if you have someone you think may possibly need to drop out, add them in anyway, it’s easier to take guests away and have less people on a table than add them in and have less room!
How do you decide where to sit at a wedding?
Most couples will have a top table where they sit in the centre, but this is entirely up to you. I would advise to make sure that where you do decide to sit, you can see all of your guests, so you can experience what a great time they are all having, and also there is plenty of space for you to be able to get up and down if you decide to mingle with your guests, for example, a top table on a mezzanine floor isn’t always the best logistically as you will feel segregated from your guests and will need to walk down a flight of stairs to mingle!
Who you sit with is also entirely your choice, remember, it’s a good three hours out of your day, you want to sit with people who will make it a fun time!
Image: Miki Photography, Venue: Bodleian Libraries
What is a top table?
The top table, by tradition is a long table facing your guests who then sit on round tables of up to 10 guests. Many couples do now opt for a round top table, but I would suggest that this is still center/top of the room with you in the middle (nobody behind you) so you can still see all of your guests. You could even have a U or E shape table with the ‘top’ being the bottom of the U or the side of the E – as shown below. The top table is there for you to be the centre of your reception, to be able to see all your guests’ smiling faces and for all of your guests to be able to see you, as that is what they are there for, to celebrate you! The other guests on the top table will also be VIP guests, whether it be your parents or your best friends. You could even decide to have a ‘sweet heart’ table with a top table for just the two of you!
Image: Abu Bakar Sanfraz, Venue: Froyle Park
What is the order of the top table at a wedding?
I will start again with tradition, with the couple sitting in the centre, and a set of parents on each side, you can even mix up the parents, ie. Couple 1’s Mum and Couple 2’s Dad – this works well if you do have divorced/separated parents. The best man then sits on the end, on the side of who they are best man for. Some couples do also decide to have a maid of honour on the table too, but I know it can get difficult as for example, you best man or your maid of honour may have a partner/children there with them too who you then have to separate them from. My suggestion with this is to not worry too much, their partner will not expect to be on the top table with them (and will probably feel awkward to do so unless they are your best friend/family!) and to sit with them someone else they may know or you think they would get on with. An alternative, as mentioned above is to have a sweetheart table with just the both of you. Many couples do ask me, but what about the speeches. Yes traditionally the best man is on the top table as he traditionally does a speech, but you can also just have the person making the speech introduced up to the top table to talk. I would always recommend doing this other than having them speak at their table as they will then have guests behind them and this will also be difficult for the photographer/videographer.
Image: Samantha Kay Photography, Venue: Charlton House
Does the bride/groom sit on the left or right at the reception?
If you are a Bride/Groom couple, then the Bride sits on the right as you are facing the table. Why? Only because in tradition, the table plan is in male/female alternation, so Father of the Groom, Mother of the Groom, Groom, Bride, Father of the Bride, Mother of the Bride – but times have changed! If you are a same sex couple, go with whichever way you feel comfortable!
Do parents sit together at a wedding reception?
Again, entirely up to you, traditionally yes, with either parents sitting together or even more traditionally, mixing the parents up to show acceptance into each others family, and this was way back when the parents choose their child’s husband/wife so they would have known each other well in many circumstances. Now, many couples are faced with maybe not having parents there on the day or having separated parents, so make sure you do what works for you. I would advise to try not to make a top table longer than 8-10 guests, so if you feel like you need Dad+1, Mum + 1 etc and that their new partners won’t be happy being split up on the day, it may be easier to forgo a top table, opt for a sweet heart table or have a top table with your best man/bridesmaids/maid of honour.
Image: Shutterbug Photography, Venue: Northbrook Park
How many tables do you need?
Make sure to speak with your venue with regards to how many tables you are allowed in the room as there will be certain fire regulations. Also check what size the tables are. For round tables which are 6 ft, you can fit a maximum of 12 guests although I would advise to keep it to 10 for comfort, for 5ft rounds, maximum is 10 with 8 being comfortable. For 6 ft trestle tables (rectangle tables generally used for the top table or if you are having banquet style with long tables or a U/E shape) you can comfortably sit 3 guests on each side without legs being a problem and generally you wouldn’t have any guests on the ends – this also wouldn’t fit with a full dining set up.
Should you assign seating at a wedding reception?
This is entirely up to you! I would advise to have a plan of who is sitting on which table, with the option of them then deciding where to actually sit on the table (no place cards) at a minimum, but this does depend on your catering. If you are having a sit down meal, I would advise a seating plan so the caterers know exactly where your guests are sitting who have dietary requirements, but if you are opting for something a little more informal such as a BBQ or street food, a free for all will work fine. The only thing I would highlight to expect here is empty seats at tables and a lot of wandering while guests find their seats. It can be difficult if for example, you have a large family group lingering at the back who then can’t find enough seats to sit together. Remember that people don’t out of their own choice just sit with other people they don’t know, so will tend to just start a new table!
How do you arrange table numbers at a wedding?
Your top table isn’t table 1, it is the TOP table! Always have a top table and a table 1. Then list your tables as you want them to be on the day. Draw it out so you can see who would be sitting in front of you, at the back, to the right etc. So often, couples write out their table plan but don’t take into consideration where these tables will actually be situated and they realise that two tables are next to each other with guests they wanted to split up! The tables then have to be moved around and the numbers no longer make sense. Always make sure the tables are in numerical order or guests will be wandering around looking for table numbers.
Image: Claudine Hartzel, Venue: Deene Park
What do you name a wedding table?
You can of course name your tables which has become very popular! You could name them after ANYTHING! Your favourite holidays, bands, films, whatever you have in common really or have experienced together! Many couples will name the top table after something very special to them, such as the place they got engaged. Naming tables really adds a touch of personalisation to your day. Make sure to not put guests on a table which is named after anything which may offend them.
Still stuck and need some help with your wedding table plan? I am luxury wedding planner, offering full planning services but also one-off planning sessions. Contact me if you would like to book a session to discuss your table plan here.